31.8.10

haircut

I am Bim. About a year ago, my life began to change drastically.
I was living happily with my room mate, Jim. We lived pretty care free and both had part-time jobs that supplied us with enough money to do what we wanted. We made sure, every month, that we renewed our World of Warcraft accounts before anything else. We actually went hungry a few times, but the bills got paid and we were able to ignore our hunger through gaming.
Pretty much every week we would have a party at our house and all of our best buds would come over to chill. We'd hook our computers together and we would all play Starcraft, sometimes all through the night.
Our diets, when we did eat (which was usually when we had friends over because we didn't want them to think we were hungry hungry hermits) would consist of poutine and pizza, so naturally I had a belly and a dark pony tail. We also listened to power metal and hung out with our friends with a band on their practice night.
Then one day my room mate started working out and his friends started calling him Guido or something. It was a street fighter name, and I thought it was funny so I did it too. I eventually figured out that this 'Guido' guy was cool, and that for nearly a month now, i've been 1-uping my room mates ego. I could tell because i'd catch him standing in front of the mirror in the bathroom for nearly half-hour periods, brushing his hair and checking his biceps.
What my hair looks like now-a-days

I became jealous pretty quick. I mean, I have been rooming with this guy, my best friend, for years now and all of a sudden, he doesn't want to stay home any more and play games and eat poutine like we used to.
"I've made some new friends" He said, "I'm doing new things... getting out of the house".
I decided at that point I would become more popular than him and I created a Youtube account then and there.
A day or two later, Jim brought home a girl. She was a tomboy, so I was sure he was just doing it to hide that he likes dicks. But not too much later, I found him moving out with her. And I was alone. For a little bit, I found Yim and he was just as cool as Jim. I got my Youtube account underway and started posting a vlog each and every day. Shit was pretty cash for a week or two. For the first week or two, my new roomie would join me on my videos. He actually had his own segment.
I found drinking. I don't know what it was. Maybe because all my friends were doing it, and it wasn't illegal, so it's obviously not a drug. I have never done a drug and never plan to.My favorite drink is Jack Daniels whiskey, but i'll pretty much drink anything now-a-days. Even the gay ones. And no, i'm not afraid. I have a girlfriend now, who isn't in on my videos hoping i'll get rich so she can have my cash.
Let me tell you how that happened... There is a pub across the road from my house. I started going to it every Friday and Saturday. It was pretty happening, hot cougars everywhere, and a bunch of metalfags bobbing in the corner drinking dollarbeers claiming to be in a band. I started hanging out with them guys and became really into music, so it quickly became my calling. I started going to all of the local concerts, I saw billy talent, disturbed, and I see my friends play at bars every week.
Eventually my room mate, Yim brought me to this neato get-together thing called geek beer, and I began to act like a fruit in front of the women. It was insane. I have never seen so many in one place since I was in school. They all wanted to be on my camera too, how typical eh?
Long story short, I got some ugly snaggle-toothed pear-shaped cunt taggin' along on me all the time now, hoping I make a buck off my vlog so she can steal it. That's how it happened.
Somewhere around the middle of August 2010, may the 21st? I lost my virginity to this girl, and figured out what all the rave about sandwiches was and I couldn't stop talking about them. I started eating semi-healthy and just stopped eating poutine all together.My double chin haunts me to the day regardless. My vlogs have been reduced to nearly nothing. I cut off my hairfarm and grew a nice tallboy job from it with gel and douche-burns.I still think i'm going to make it to the big time sitting in my house vlogging. Dreams.
The rest is in the making.

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